I Shouldn't Be Alive

Recently I have begun watching a show from Animal Planet called I Shouldn't Be Alive. It's absolutely fantastic. Basically the show is a reenactment of real near-death experiences that are super intense. All of the scenes are narrated by the typical epic voice of television as well as the actual survivor.

The stories on I Shouldn't Be Alive range anywhere from a researcher being trapped alone in the middle of the Amazon forrest and having to walk a bajillion miles (all while fighting sickness and starvation) to a tourist stuck on a volcano living off of leaves and muddy water.

Anyway, to get to the point, ever since I began obsessively watching this show... I can't help but sort of... want to be on the show. I'm sure you've realized by now just how weird and twisted my thoughts can be at times... but I mean just think about it. These people go through something godawful and live to tell the tale. They can go through the rest of their lives thinking... wow, sure I may be having a crappy day at work, but at least I'm not being forced to climb down a mountain with two broken legs in -60 degree temperature (Farenheit).

Pretty much their experience puts them above everyone else around them, because they truly have battled death, and they have won. They are pretty much the biggest badasses on the planet, and nobody could possibly call them a poser or even think of denying their status because that kind of shit doesn't happen to the usual critic.

As of my life right now... if I were to be on I Shouldn't Be Alive, the only interesting part would be the hotness of the actress who they chose to play me, because the survivor's looks are always exaggerated by the rein-actors.

Reality:

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My troubles clearly make me better than everyone else. Or just an idiot.