Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Where's the Damn Gorilla Suit?!

I hate losing things. No, wait. I hate it when my brother loses things and refuses to help me find them. Seriously. If you've got the nerve to put something somewhere out of the ordinary, have the sense to remember where you put it! Or at least help your poor sister who is tearing up the floorboards trying to find it.

Now, I bet you are probably wondering why I'm looking for a gorilla suit. That's a very good question. You see, every year our school has an activities fair, where all of the clubs can try and attract the attention of random lurker students who don't actually do anything productive with their time. Usually there are about a thousand different tables with Dumdum lollipop bribes and big posters.

Most kids steal the candy. They just flat out take the entire basket, or they sign up with no intention of ever joining your masterpiece of a club and take your candy. It's depressing. Therefore, I never bring candy to my club's table. No, we've done just fine getting people through yelling, reason, and setting up next to a table with candy so people have to listen to us while waiting in line for some food.

But this year is my senior year. This year, everything I do has to be incredibly spectacular and cool. That's just how it works.

So, while brainstorming ideas, here comes the revolutionary idea of... THE GORILLA SUIT. Last Halloween my brother invested in a rockin' gorilla suit, and so the idea to come to the activities fair dressed as a gorilla began to overwhelm every other smidgen of intelligence in my brain. It had to be done.

My friend and I planned it all out. We asked the activities fair coordinator to make sure the security guards wouldn't tackle us to the ground, and we figured out how we'd make a grand entrance and everything. It was going to be awesome. Kids in my school just can't resist people being anonymous and random. They just can't.

But anyway, all this preparation and excitement buildup was for nothing. I can't find the damn gorilla suit, and my brother won't help me. It's not where he said it was, or anywhere else for that matter. I have seriously thrown things out of every closet and drawer of my house looking... and it's insanely depressing. The fair is on Thursday and Friday, so I'm going to keep looking until then. I'll make sure to let all of you know how that goes... but I wouldn't get my hopes up.

It's making me go bananas.
No regret for horrible puns.

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